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The week beginning May 17th 2010

05/23/10

Permalink 11:19:36 pm, by Skillachi
Categories: Commentary, News, Weekly Rap-Up

The week beginning May 17th 2010

This week has been quite frankly the most exciting week we have seen for this entire year. Minus the fact that my Birthday fell in this week (sadly some events dampened my birthweek), it was truly one which brought alot of excitement to Jamaicans. I was really hoping to find a more... happier topic to write on today, but really and truly it wouldn't make sense because there is only one news item that is filling the thoughts of Jamaicans this week and that is the progress of the extradition of Dudus.

The week started with a rumour being spread through the general public about the possibility of the Prime Minister signing the order to have Dudus extradited to America and the resulting panic which occured because of that possibility. Yes business places shut down and sent all their employees home early, people sprinted eagerly to bus stations so that they can make their way home before the ensueing gunbattle which was bound to take place as a result. The traffic to get out of town can be described as simply clogged but people reached home on a day which was uneventful for the most part, but showed the depth of the issue in Jamaica.

The next thing which occured was that the Prime Minister gave a "heartfelt" speech outlying the "Major issues" at hand and also offering his "heart felt apologies". Of course I put all those words in quotation marks because really the speech was not so heartfelt as it was more of a "ok you actually managed to catch on to what I was doing and I didnt expect that so I'll make a speech to see if it will ease your mind", the only major issues that the people wanted to hear were not outlined (except for the part where he says they will be signing the extradition request), and he never really apologizes to the nation because for a "mistake" of this magnitude one can only expect that a proper apology would have lasted around 5 minutes long and the only words that the PM would be allowed to use are: I, Apologize, Am, Sorry, Please, Forgive, me - in as many different combinations and languages as possible. Yes I expect him to apologize the multitude of Jamaicans in all the various native tongues that exist here.

Following the speech the people in the garrison communities believed to be controlled by the strong man then went on lock down, as virtual battle lines were drawn and there was something of a "do it if you're bad" stand off between the policemen and the people of the communities. During this stand off the police calmly asked all the necessary people including Dudus' lawyer to simple have the man give himself in so that the loss of lives which more than likely would have occured in any other situation would not happen. However for the most part the country was quiet...

Until today where the feces seemed to have finally landed at its destination by forcefully hitting the blades of the proverbial fan. Today the all out war between the gunmen and Jamaica's lawmakers began and the results are being felt everywhere. Police stations were burnt down, officers were shot, gunmen went on a rampage in all communities - yes all communities as they have managed to reach as far as red hills road in their activities - and Jamaica is seeing just how far the people are willing to go for this one man. I was personally quite surprised when I checked the major international news outlets to see that the situation in Jamaica had garnered so much media attention that it was front page news over other major events such as the oil pouring into the golf and the recent plane crash in the middle east.


**Screenshot from CNN.com

**Screenshot from MSN.com

A state of emergency was declared for the Kingston and St. Andrew area and the power provider removed the electricity in the Tivoli Gardens and Denham Town areas in its attempt to assist the police in their work. In case you didnt know, a state of emergency is something which is normally declared only during war time or during a time where a problem arises that cant be solved by regular means. Most people now refuse to leave their houses as they are the only places which offer any form of decent security and I can safely say that right now as I am typing this I am listening to the sounds of gunshots from at least 5 different identifiable sources each sounding more powerful than the next but thankfully sounding far away (and I hope that it stays that way).

One can only imagine just how much our economy will be affected by such activities and hope that we will be able to safely recover from this event with our nation in tact despite all the International Media attention that is turned on to us. After all being a country that depends so heavily on tourism for its foreign exchange we cant afford to scare tourists away.

This is a time when one can only pray that all law abiding citizens will make their way out of this situation with their lives in tact.

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Bruk Pocket Jamaican

"Recently, this Jamaican won the 10 million special lottery for a dollar. As soon as the office of the Lottery Corporation was open on the following day, he was there to collect his winnings.

Graciously, he presented his winning ticket to the clerk and in his best English uttered his request "Me cum fi collect the 10 millian dallars, si me ticket ya".

After reviewing and checking the ticket with his manager, the clerk returned and requested on how he would like his payments. The Jamaican replied "Mi wan all a de moni now". "Unfortunately, Sir" the nervous clerk responded, "The procedures are that we can only give you one million now and the balance equally over the next 20 years".

Furious and agitated, the Jamaican asked for the manager, who re-iterated "Sir, my assistant is correct, it is the regulation of the corporation that we initially pay you one million dollars now with the balance paid to you equally over the next 20 years".

Outraged, the Jamaican slammed his hand on the desk and shouted in anger, "Oonu tek me fi idiat, me wan all a de moni now or oonu gi me bak me rass dallar!!"

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